What if…

I have had more than my share of making the best of crap situations. At least I believe I’ve had more than my share. Let’s just say I’ve been through some shit and I’ve been in the shits.

I can’t pretend I am anywhere near as despondent as I once was and I can’t imagine myself going back to that place. But still, I wonder.

The most interesting thing to me is that just when I seem to be on the right path and I begin lengthening my strides, the road turns to quicksand. It’s really quite stunning and I can only surmise that the adage that says where ever you go, there you are is the truth. I can’t seem to find my way around a positive without running head on into a negative.

I have been thisclose to chucking it all, jumping in my car and driving off into the sunset. I don’t quite see myself as Thelma or Louise but I must say sometimes the thought of just not being here is exhilarating.

But then I become curious.

What if…

I am about to experience a positive that make all the negatives seem like small bricks in the grand edifice of my life. Something so wonderful that I am unable to remember any unpleasantness that preceded.

What if…

I am a necessary part of someone else’s magnificent journey. Maybe I’m a link in someone else’s chain. What if stepping away from my life had the effect of unraveling someone else’s. And what if I step away from my life just before I encounter the magical link in my own chain?

What if…

Everything that I see as a problem would instead be mere challenges designed to keep me from getting bored. Hence why I’ve pretended to be a sagittarius all year.

What if…

My love of lemonade is the reason life has given me so many lemons.