Here … and Nowhere

I’ve got that feeling again. And I’ve had to check myself and remind myself, again and again, that I am not my thoughts. I am not my thoughts. I’ve been sinking deeper and deeper into myself. Deeper into the place where I believe I truly live. I used to go there regularly and at will….

Running On Empty

Twenty-fifteen is half over and all I can say is good riddance. I need the second half to be better than the first. My job has become an exercise in torture the likes of which I had not anticipated. This has put me in a funk that has frightened me on a level I have never…

Spotlight

I’m not a front and center person. I enjoy the view from the back of the room. My struggle lately is one of direction.So what else is new?Which way should I go? Am I going the right way? Should I be here? Should I go there?Maybe its because I’m a Cancer. Like a crab, I…

Head Trip

Right now all I want is to get out of my own head. I want the voices to be silent…or at the very least, tone it down, a bit.I moved to Los Angeles 13 years ago today. I have no idea where the years have gone. Looking back, it was a move made in desperation that has…

My Self…Forever

Some people are meant to be part of a group or at the very least (or most), paired up. I am obsessed with the concept of aloneness. I love, love, love being alone. Of course, for me, aloneness is more than a concept.  Much more. I wish I knew why I enjoy being alone as…

Rue Sesame

If I could be a child again, what would I do differently?    1    do it in Paris   2    be less obedient   3    have an imaginary friend   4    be an absolute nerd instead of a partial nerd   5    be the eldest rather than the youngest   6    listen at keyholes …

Twenty-fourteen & Me

The purpose of this blog has always been to help me develop my voice as a writer. This is a place to peck out fragments of ideas. Ideas that I would develop elsewhere. Sometimes I have a lot to say and sometimes I say very little. But what I have learned most recently is my…

Fresh Start…Old Race

2014 has barely begun and I’m where I was in 2011. That’s not a bad thing.It’s just that I need to make a decision.Not a decision..a move. I was sorely in need of a change three years ago and I got it.I definitely need a change now. But, like I said, it’s not a bad…

Random Acts of Fitness

You would think with my Los Angeles life, I would be fit and fabulous. There are so many choices when it comes to fitness. I can climb mountains, hike rugged trails, swim the ocean blue, jog, run cycle.Name it and I can do it.But I don’t.Being in Paris again reminded me of what I am…

Free To Be Me

I think I’m changing. Correction: I know I’m changing I can’t quite put my finger on it but I feel it. I feels light and delicate. There is a fluttering of my senses. It’s a lightness of being ….and a sureness of my emotional dexterity that has allowed me to almost defy gravity. As Thanksgiving approaches,…